An extraordinary new cure has just been developed for exactly this kind of sordid problem. It wouldn’t have anything to do with leeches GcMAF, would it? I had no idea you were a medical man

Wednesdays are Script Workshop and Conodont Phylogeny Nights at the Old Entomologist. Here we all are, wondering where to go next with the long-running GcMAF saga, for readers are calling out for new episodes; they cannot have enough of the quirky cartoonishly-exaggerated characters.

Not everyone was reading all the way from the start, of course, so for the benefit of newcomers, I tried to put together a precis of the dramatis personae and the twisty-turnies of the plot so far. May involve run-on sentences:

Siblings Trevor Banks and Lesley Hutchings (née Banks) worked for David Noakes, spamming his blood-derived GcMAF cure-all on bulletin boards and patient-support forums, before entering into competition with Noakes with their own companies and websites; later to go their separate ways (Lesley taking custody of the lotion side of their business, Trevor taking the Cytonics / Cytoinnovations brand). In a parallel plot thread they worked with married couple Doug and Amanda Mary Jewell, who came into the GcMAF business from a therapeutic business involving malpractice and mismanagement at a Bulgarian hotel [think 'Fawlty Towers' with bleach enemas]... that collaboration went tits-up when their 1stProEngineering website morphed into multiple instantiations, with hacking-related explanations for customers who lost their money; before Amanda Mary split from Doug and was last seen in Belize, complaining of conspiracies and persecution, after a stint of medical cosplay at a cancer-scam clinic in Mexico. All intertwined with other sub-plots involving Marco Ruggiero, his insider takeover of Noakes' business, and his post-GcMAF product-range that so far includes 'Bravo'© Magic Yoghurt, Non-Dairy Yoghurt, GOleic©, and Rerum©. 

Also Snuggles is a lick arse, Milton is a toffee nosed git and Quacky is a self-righteous blowhard...
...But TL;DW.

The enmeshed familial backgrounds lend an additional frisson of excitement to the alliances and internecine estrangements that enliven the plot, IMHO.

But with Lesley and her erstwhile employer / competitor Noakes both sidelined and lying low as they await court appearances,* the plot has encountered an impasse and entered the doldrums, or possibly vice versa. Trevor has set aside his client-base in Latin America[a collaboration with Kerri Rivera, another of the bleach-enema Banditti] to focus on promoting his 'Omnia Vitality' imitation of Ruggiero Rerum.** We are unsure of which direction to steer in.

1. Another Kiwi vouchsafed the idea of bringing previously-peripheral characters to centre-stage, which would (in his words) "Liven up the story like bacon does to Brussels sprouts". There is, for instance, third sibling Lynda Thyer (née Banks), who assisted Noakes at his GcMAF refinery garage and co-authored a series of mockademic advertisements (extruded through journal-shaped spigots from parasitic publishers).



Lynda is moving into the diet-supplement magic-pill sector of the economy, if company records are any guide.*** But she retains enough loyalty to the miracle molecule and to her former compadres to come to the defense of a New-Age griftery in Bournemouth when the BBC caught it pimping Amanda's merchandise. Much like Showbiz, GcMAF grifting is hard to give up.


2. Part of the in-universe belief system is that a normal and essential human enzyme, 'nagalase', is actually a sign of cancer or extraneous infection or vaccination-borne nanobot infestation. Thus regular Nagalase blood tests are an obligatory component of diagnosis and for monitoring improvement. Still somewhere in Bulgaria, Douglas Jewell has registered the domains nagalasetestingindia.info and nagalasetestingindia.net.¹ No website has been built there yet, so we cannot be sure whether he proposes to expland into India (an under-exploited, largely-untouched market), or whether the target is local... it may be that Indian pharmaceutical suppliers enjoy a special level of esteem and credibility in the minds of the Bulgarian public. We should not forget the Indian snake-deity connotations of "Naga".


Doug also targets Bulgarian suckers with an Indian-themed supplement-pill webstore "Bangalore Biotechnologies": a.k.a. Mantaray Supplements. Registering domains through Iceland -- because cyberpiracy!! -- with his new e-address, dougsnewworld@unseen.is.²

These "New World" stylings are suitably ominous and post-apocalyptic, with echoes of Doug's earlier Wayward-Pines-themed Apocalypse Survival Ark scam. It would be easy to devote more flashback episodes to more of Doug Jewell's Bulgarian exploits but I am concerned that this would rob his character of all plausibility.


Those stylings also echo Doug's speculative £207,725 budget for a Nagalase / GcMAF-testing laboratory, "Project Better World", from January 2017 [with conversion from Central African Francs]... uploaded to the Interlattice by an unfamiliar personage, under circumstances that are cloud-bound and whereabouts unknown, with no indication of the prospective funding source at whom the pitch was directed. Will all this end well? Magic 8-Ball says "Doubtful".

3. Greenish Hugh was all for "making a teaser trailer for a future episode and running it up the flagpole to see if the wheels fall off."

4. It will all be easier to choose between these options when we decide whether the GcMAF Saga is an interminable multi-generational soap-opera or a Jacobean Revenge Tragedy that ends with everyone dead. Personally I am nostalgic for the Fosdyke Saga.

* David Noakes is unclear on the concept of "low profile". His legal imbroglio has inspired an epic tear-drenched anonymous whine in his media outlet. Pro-Tip: When harping on the triviality of one's alleged naughtiness, DO NOT MENTION the potential 10- or 18-year sentence.

You can be dragged out of England, because of a misunderstanding, or French corruption, as is happening to David Noakes, and put into a French prison, amongst the worst in Europe. [...]
In David’s case the French prosecutors were OCLAESP, the utterly corrupt heath department of the Gendarmerie, who presented charges that were clearly perjury. And French judges listen to the prosecution; they don’t care about the defence.
They want to send him to prison for 10 years. There is no offset - he might do 18 years, and at 64, with squalor, rats, cockroaches, fist fights and daily homosexual rapes, there is no way he would survive.

Not content with settling scores through poison-pen websites and borough-newspaper-related activities, Noakes has been inducted to the prestigious Board of Governators of an antivax Alt-Med Food Purity group, the National Health Federation. In return he publishes glowing advertorials for that group's international coat-tail-riding antivax agitation:

The National Health Federation (NHF) President Scott Tips was one of the speakers at the Trieste event, which was attended by at least 2000 intelligent and well-informed parents and activists. His talk, even though very badly translated into Italian by his interpreter, was well received by the enthusiastic and vocal crowd.

The NHF has a general convergence of interests with Noakes' Alt-Right politics, for neo-nationalist groups like the UKIP and the Italian 5-Star Movement have assimilated antivax anxieties, making them fellow-travellers. But the NHF may have not thought through their decision to recruit the lad... for when you lie down with dogs it was probably a mistake to have smeared yourself beforehand with peanut butter and fish paste you get up looking all antisemitic. Which may not be the connotations they seek -- they still aspire to an appearance of respectability and principled integritude, while Noakes is the perennial victim of conspiracies and gathering dark forces, and it is only a matter of time before he is back on the Protocols of the Elders of Zion again.

...not one word can be broadcast by the BBC unless it goes through the German Siemens company's network systems. The Zionists who own Siemens control the BBC's output, and have done for at least 10 years.

** Trevor was in Croatia last December, peddling Omnia and passing on his expertise in Dark-Field Microscopy.

*** The listed address of Lynda's new company "Healing Supplements Ltd", in Dover, previously housed "Immunology Ltd." (with Lynda Banks as Director / Secretary) and then the three-generation family vehicle "Cytoinnovations". Trevor and Lesley also traded from there back when they were still in the building recycling / restoration trade.

1. The domain nagalase.in was unavailable because Trevor Banks bought it in 2015.

2. The "unseen.is" webmail service was evidently an off-shoot of the "Before it's news" Alex-Jones-wannabees. One might acquire one of their e-addresses if, for instance, you wanted to infiltrate a group of conspiracy loons, and needed to signal your conspiracy-mindedness. Conversely, if you're using an @unseen.is address to register domains, you'd just be a gullible loon.