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UK Prime Minister shows concern for plight of unemployed; announces new initiative to assist the unemployable


The Case of the Midwife Toad

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Worst Sherlock Holmes pastiche EVAH
Characters continue to escape from unwritten Carl Hiassen novels into the narrative of what we laughingly call "reality". Some might blame Hiassen for failing to maintain a proper Fictive Containment Protocol, but in all fairness the fault devolves upon the Reality Studio, for blurring the boundaries of fiction by stealing Hiassen's plot-lines. So here's Florida Woman Kristin Comella -- guest of America's Favourite Alt-Med Grifter, Chief Scientific Officer of Bioheart Ltd, and YMCA aerobics instructor:
All that is from a lawsuit last year -- since settled for unspecified damages -- after Bioheart blinded a series of customers with an untested, unapproved macular-degeneration 'cure', costing $5000 though masquerading as a "clinical trial", and consisting of body-fat-into-eyeball injections. The company subsequently changed its name to "US Stem Cell", for added patriotism and to avoid confusion with the plethora of other corporate names of the form "Bio***". Most of which will be mentioned below. "Plethora" has the shape of a plural noun but I cannot be arsed looking up what the singular form might be.

Kristen is not the real subject of this post, but she provides a convenient entry-point. Be patient, we will get to the toads soon enough. For Bioheart interrupted their busy schedule of blinding clients, for long enough to put out a cheerful press release about other clinical trials of the magic fat-slurry injections, this time to regenerate damaged hearts. These even led to The Most Influential Paper of 2016 (published in a pay-to-print BMC vanity press), in which it emerged that the "trial" aspect consisted of charging $$$ then asking the suckers customers if they felt any better.

Some data were collected in a TOTALLY LEGIT stem-cell clinic / car-lube workshop in Tijuana, though none of the customers there were formally enrolled in a clinical trial, judging from the absence of updates to the entry in the Trial Registry. It is almost as if people set up 'Clinical trials' merely to cover their alt-med modality with a semblance of official approval. Other data are credited to Dr Himanshu Bansal, who runs "Anupam Hospital" -- a penis-enlargement clinic in a small town in rural India (shown below) -- though he did not even get around to registering a clinical trial with the Indian registry. We read, however, that the non-existent trial
was approved [...] by the ethics committee of Anupam Hosptial [sic] called the Institutional Committee for Stem Cell Research and Therapy (AAH 002/12-13)
which cannot be distinguished from the contents of Bansal's sock drawer.
Note ATM on ground floor

I am not sure whose novel Himanshu Bansal escaped from. He is a man of boundless aspiration and creativity, whose imagination soars beyond the surly bonds of reality. As evinced in the impressive list of totally fraudulent qualifications and academic honours he has heaped upon himself. In India he is regarded as a buffoonish but dangerous con-man, and his continued medical career as an indictment of the corruption and toothlessness of the regulatory authorities. His own bone-marrow-sourced stem-cell extracts cure autism, blindness and spinal-cord severence, because of course they do.

But Bansal has a sharp eye for collaborative outlets for his exercises in fabrication, and has collaborated with Bioheart in yet further advertisements for fat-slurry injection, to cure arthritis ["No Study Results Posted"]. No toads were injured during the performance of that study either.

The last time we met Bansal was when his company Revita Life Sciences teamed up with Sergei Paylian, and the latter's start-up Bioquark, to chase ambulances, wave shrouds and recruit brain-dead bodies to farm them for organ transplants regenerate their obliterated cranial contents. Using an innovative combination of stem cells, frog-spawn squeezings, and dead-chicken-waving charlatanage. This was some serious mad-sciencing (with the same Ethics Approval from an International Committee of Bansal's sock-drawer).

One wonders how riddled with grifters a scheme must be to convince the churnalists not to waste their valuable pixels. One asks rhetorical questions. One's sock-drawer echoes the questions.

Alas, science journamalists generally reported the venture as a long-shot but plausibly click-baity example of cutting-edge research. So the "Science Editor" at the Daily Torygraph dutifully pukefunneled Bansal's claim to have his first carcase, as of May 2016. In contrast, another account from November shows the trial going tits-up before it could even start, when Indian authorities noticed the absence of the permissions required for a drug trial, and expunged the entry from the Indian trial registry. But the people at Bioquark have not abandoned the dream, and they certified (of last week) that the study was "still recruiting participants"... though not beginning until July 2017.
What could go wrong?
MOVING RIGHT ALONG... readers will recall that in the Bansal / Bioquark 'ReAnima' collaboration, one central element was a procedure for re-programming human tissue cells into totipotent stem cells, patented by Sergei Paylian (Chief Scientific Officer at Bioquark). By cultivating them in close propinquity to frog eggs and running 6 million volts through both ('electroporation'), to allow the undifferentiated, endless-possibility nature of the latter to ooze out through the leaky cell membranes, and seep into the former. "Non-differentiation" being reified, like Phlogiston and Caloric, as a magical mixture of peptides. Paylian has coined the name "Bioquantine" for this transformative blend, keeping up the tradition of biology / particle-physics mash-up nomenclature. It was to be named after himself, but "Payline" conjures up less desirable mental images of the staff dashing to the bank and queuing up to cash their wage cheques.

Another component of the brain-regrowth project is an oral or injectible form of the magic peptide mixture, obtained from the frog eggs with a kitchen blender. I AM NOT MAKING THIS UP.

That was not a passage I expected to be reading today, but at least it provides an excuse to use the coveted "Iron Chefmaster" tag.

Puzzlingly, the spawn still needs the electroporation prior to extraction. Indeed, in new additions to the protocol, Bioquantine production also requires EHF radio stimulation, and ELF irradiation, and the dulcet tones of the Greg Allman band. Does anyone else begin to suspect that the Bioquark crew are just making shit up as they go along?

Evidently, when orally consumed, the Bioquantine spreads its stem-cellulising goodness throughout the recipient's body, encouraging tissues to de-specialise and proliferate. Thereby curing cancer. And all other disease.

In this particular Bansal / Paylian collaboration there were nine patients, with six conditions, who had fallen into the hands of clinics spread around India, Russia, Georgia, Ukraine and Czechia. The relationships between the authors and these clinics are not specified, but we are assured that all frog-squeezin' consumption was approved by "an Institutional Review Board of each principal investigators clinical facility". Despite the title affected by this particular journal-shaped jizz-mop, no formal "clinical trials" took place. The punctuation is erratic and I can only surmise that BioAccent (the publisher) is suffering from a shortage of apostrophes and spaces, forcing authors to pay extra if they want their work released with a normal quota of word-breaks.

BioAccent, ah yes, those lovable scamps. They are widely admired in parasitical-publishing industry, for having "Title most reminiscent of a brand of washing powder", and for "Logo most reminiscent of 1950s book-cover space-station design". Also for the egregious quality of their spamming for contributions, which frequently attains a kind of pity-fuck pathos. There are many asses in their stable, many jizz-mops in their broom-closet, and Paylian is determined to publish in all of them, drawn perhaps by the appeal of a name conformant to the 'Bio***' template.
Hmanshu Bansal is not credited with co-authorship for this one (he has his own outlets for publication). This time the spawn squeezin's -- Is there anything they can't do? -- they cure murine models of melanoma, and brain injury, and skin wrinkling... Bioquark are evidently targeting a broad spectrum of commercial activities, a range of "Threapeutic Applications".
What could go wrong?
But wait -- Kate Sheridan at Stat reports that Bioquark's CEO is touting plans to reanimate and regenerate the whole panoply of dead-chicken-waving, this time outsourcing the procurement of disposable carcases to South American clinics yet to be recruited. The Stat piece was mirrored in Sci.Am., and then was sucked into the maelstrom of click-bait, to be regurged in gently edited form across a plethora pleroma of churnalistic news-sites. The absence of details about this new aspirational venture reached such a rarefied state of vagueness that to call it "vaporware" conveys too great a sense of solidity, so dibs on my new coinage "plasmaware".

The original ReAnima package involved a "lasers-to-the-head" component, and a "median-nerve stimulation" part, shoe-horned into the protocol because a panoply of lasers and chiropractic electro-acupuncture were already part of Bansal's scammocopoeic practice. There is no reason why South American clinics should include this medley of random theatrical stylings. The CEO clung to them anyway, and defended their inclusion by pointing out the sheer absurdity of expecting any one cargo-cultic treatment to regrow a brain on its own (it may be that he had not thought through the South American intentions in such detail until providing Stat with the interview):
It’s our contention that there’s no single magic bullet for this, so to start with a single magic bullet makes no sense. Hence why we have to take a different approach,” said Ira Pastor, CEO of Bioquark.
In other news, it would be absurd to plant magic beans and expect to reach the moon by climbing the beanstalk, hence why we also have to eat some of the beans, and propel ourselves with magic farts.

Further perplexity arises from Bioquark's revival of the Bansal collaboration: recruitment at Anupam had been tagged as 'suspended' (after Indian authorities brought the hammer down ), but as of June 15 it switched back to 'active'.

One can only be sure that Paylian and Pastor are very, very keen to attract some fresh venture capital.
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UPDATE: Just look at this fund-raising slideshow from 2012. It contains leveraging! At the time they offered "Major investor value inflection in 3 years", and proposed to start slowly -- regenerating a human kidney in situ -- before moving on to other organs. Perhaps their investor value has not yet inflected and there is a growing sense of desperation.
Bioquark, Inc., (www.bioquark.com) a biopharmaceutical company engaged in the development of proprietary biological drugs that can be simultaneously leveraged for both the regeneration and repair of human organs and tissues, CEO, Ira S. Pastor, presenting the Company’s overview at the Rodman and Renshaw Annual Global Investment Conference’s (14th Annual Healthcare Conference) on Thursday, September 11, 2012, at 10:00 a.m. Eastern time at the Waldorf Astoria Hotel in New York City
It also displays the murine melanoma and brain-damage results which Paylian would later squeeze out through BioAccent in 2016. Except those later versions of the diagrams are poorly-reproduced, with higher contrast. They also have different dates: "10 days" rather than "14 days".

[Above: 2012 version; below: 2016 version]

"7 days", "14 days", "21 days" morph into "10 days", "20 days", "30 days". It is the metric system gone mad!


[Above: 2012 version; below: 2016 version]

Just saying, dudes, that when you can't keep your story straight about which slides show cyclooxygenase expression (or down-regulation) and which ones show inducible nitric oxide synthase, it does not inspire confidence. Nor is it a good look when the same slide shows "control cells" in 2012 and "40 days" treatment in 2016.

Science blogger 'Abe'had his own doubts about the quality of the melanoma data.

Brightness falls from the air,Queens have died young and fair

Ququrbit n.

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A superposition of wave-states, used to perform quantum-computing calculations within a quantum-coherent cryogenic zucchini.

Is there a word for "Enjoyment derived from seeing someone else be criticised for experiencing Schadenfreude"?

Pooparazzi n.

These are the first signs of sonic attackYou will notice small objects such as ornaments oscillatingYou will notice vibrations in your diaphragmThere will be bleeding from orificesThere will be an ache in the pelvic regionYou may be subject to fits of hysterical shouting or even laughter

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The last time the Riddled Journal Club looked at Drs Klinghardt and Ruggiero's article-shaped claim-stake, carving out their territory within the Chronic Lyme Disease goldfield, it was Shooting-Fish-inna-Barrel night at the Old Entomologist.
Company logo: synchronised-swimming sperm
So the pointing & laughing was focused on the scammy, spammy nature of the "Science Publications" who extrude the 'American Journal of Immunology'[editors include M. Ruggiero] from their base in the United Arab Emirates.¹ Some secondary hilarity ensued from Klinghardt's method for diagnosing otherwise-undetectable occult Lyme Disease, i.e. by dowsing. I AM NOT MAKING THIS UP... dowsing was rebranded as Applied Kinesiology in the 1960s, before Klinghardt -- who never saw a grift he didn't want to copy -- appropriated it as "Autonomic Response Testing".

Fish-inna-Barrel Tuesdays are not actually as much fun as they sound, because sometimes the fish shoot back if the vile Throgmorton happened to have stocked the barrels with archerfish. Of course similar problems arise on Picking-the-Low-Fruit Wednesdays when the fruit trees fail to cooperate.

Anyways... it was inevitable that hand-held ultrasound scanners would find a place as a theatrical prop in the advertisement for the RK Protocol, for they are a recurring feature in Ruggiero's artistic practice theragnostic cosplay. We have previously seen his discoveries that the humble scanner can diagnose autism (recording brain abnormalities that remain unnoticed by autism researchers, those purblind fools), and can facilitate snake-oil treatment of brain cancer, by relaxing epithelial-cell junctionsto make brain capillaries leaky and let the snake-oil through. After hours his students and assistants brandish the scanners while they chase one another around the laboratory making Pew-pew-pew noises.

So this is the new breakthrough. It is a tenet of faith in alt-med circles that the wriggly little Borrelia burgdorferi spirochaetes of Lyme Disease like to sequester themselves within the cells of your tissues in Double Secret Probation -- inert, unnoticed by the immune system, therefore undetectable by the usual tests of antibodies or even DNA. But an internal ultrasonic caress will rark the little buggers up in the manner of earthworm grunting, driving them out from the cells to renew their rampage and undergo detection.

It is not entirely clear how the ultrasounds -- with a millimeter wavelength -- can interact with structure at the subcellular scale of microns, with such dramatic and preferential effect. And given the scanner's biological impact, one wonders at its blithe and cavalier use as a harmless diagnostic tool; it is almost as if Ruggiero is not in fact stupid enough to believe in its brain-melting, spirochaete-rousing pluripotency. But we recently saw a 1970s documentary in which ultrasound irradiation of the soil, meant for pesticidal purposes, had the unexpected side-effect of transforming the previously-peaceful occupants of Manchester Morgue into reanimated shamblers with an antisocial hunger. Perhaps a similar phenomenon is at work.
Below: Effects of scanner over-use

The RK Protocol continues with PCR testing of each customer's urine sample, to confirm the post-ultrasonification appearance of DNA from the previously-dowsed spirochaete. This task of bringing reality into conformity with the results of Klinghardt's ART-woo is outsourced to “DNA Connexions”, a Colorado Springs centre of proprietory state-of-the-aunt DNA-detection procedures. Owned by Dr. Blanche Grube, with a Dr. Christopher Shade as Lab Director. Grube also trades as Biocomp Laboratories at the same strip-mall address, where she purveys a
“blood serum procedure […] Biocompatibility test, a comprehensive report that simply states whether the dental materials are Highly Reactive, Moderately Reactive, or Least Reactive.”
She is further said to operate a dental clinic -- catering for clients who cannot tell the difference between a dental bridge and the one in Brooklyn -- where they can have their fillings replaced in the unlikely event that they are dangerously Reactive. Meanwhile Shade’s primary income stream is “Quicksilver Scientific”, part of the ecosystem of Mercury Detection clinics... there he sells mercury testing (plus the usual scammocopoeia of supplements, plus Hemp Oil), and commends clients to Grube’s dentistry if their amalgams prove to be leaching the naughty element into their bloodstreams. Sounds legit!

It may be that Klinghardt is merely hewing to the code of Professional Courtesy when he shares access to the suckers' wallets as widely as possible. He and DNA Connexions regularly appear as a double-act at Chronic Lyme scam-fests trade-fairs, but this does not establish that they have a mutually-beneficial business arrangement.

The paper says little about how to cure Chronic Lyme disease once it is diagnosed. The authors note, however, that Ruggiero's current nostrum "Rerum" showed therapeutic promise when used as a "positive control". As tested by dowsing. I am not making this up.
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1. According to Ruggiero's erstwhile business partner David Noakes, writing anonymously at one of severalhating books vanity websites devoted to score-settling,
There is nothing predatory about The American Journal of Immunology, and the journal would be insulted to read that.
I'll take that risk.
Of course Noakes would say that.

Unguent Fever

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Buy the revolutionary GcMaf immunotherapy that is taking the wellness industry by storm!

Wait, what?
If you are like the intrepid Riddled staff, you will have read that sentence and are wondering "What in the name of Odin's Ampullang is the 'Wellness industry'?" You may suspect, by analogy with the 'fitness industry', that the 'wellness' traded in this sector of the economy is not a physical condition (on a par with health or illth), and more an aspirational life-style, marked by commitment and investment and the purchase of accessories. You may be looking around nervously in case some earnest young person is about to accost you with explanations that 'health' is derived from 'hale', which is itself an old form of 'whole' (we all know that conversation). How large is the Wellness Industry, and at what point will Alt-Med hipsters adopt "Big Wellness" as a term of opprobrium?
[Big Wellness -- stolen from Oglaf]

But I should explain. Please to recall that "GcMAFplus" is a new supplier of skin-creams laced with a purportedly-beneficial "Vitamin-D Binding Protein". It showed up earlier this year to fill the ecological niche left vacant when the producer of "MAFactive" ran into legal entanglements. In US markets it is branded as "GlycoPlus" (to assuage the purists who insist that GcMAF ≠ VDBP) and purveyed through webstores with titles like "reactivatedwellness" and "purelivinghealthandwellness". Right now, though, we are going to review the Australian distributors of the stuff.

The webshop at 'gcmafproducts.com' was sometimes bandied about as a reliable GcMAF supplier. This was odd and inexplicable, for that pop-up outlet belongs to Darren Fleming of North Melbourne (also calling himself the Baron of Merlona), who is conceivably the world's worst con-man... his sundry grifting FAILs create the impression that he acquired a book on "How to Make $$$ with Fraudulent Qualifications and Mendacious Merchandise" (along with a handful of magic beans), only to find that the unscrupulous vendor had ripped him off and all the pages were blank. Thus his website is a fantasy list of the scammy but yet-to-materialise GcMAF knock-off products that he aspires to palm off on customers. The makers of MAFactive creams put their trust in Darren as the first Australian outlet for their products (before these vanished down the memory hole), reflecting the depth of their due diligence, or in recognition of a kindred spirit.

Anni Diamond -- Cancer Guide, Transformational Success Coach, erstwhile beauty-salonist and organiser of Cancer Scamborees -- is more successful at monetising her fantasy life, demonstrating that characters can escape into the world from a Tom Sharpe novel and still make a success of their new existence. Her webstore is wellnessproducts.com.au because what else would it be called?

Then a challenger appears! -- as they are wont to do! -- in the form of wellnessevolution.com.au. The shill for Big Wellness in this case turns out to be Tasmania Woman, Lucy Corrigan (backed by the BL & L Corrigan Family Trust). This inspired the following Sloka Lymerick, which, as you have not heard it, I will proceed to relate:
If brain-fade is driving you manic
While ticks send you into a panic
Improve your emotions
With special skin lotions
You buy from a lady Tasmanic.
An alternative couplet was rejected on grounds of good taste, tempting though it was to rhyme "chrism" and "jizm". 400 quatloos to the first reader to suggest a decent rhyme for 'unguent'!

Since GcMAF is involved, the whole Wounded-Healer Shamanism hairball of thought is never far away [most conspicuously in the case of Amanda Mary Jane and her pig-colon xenotransplant]. Here with Tasmania Lady, the path which led her to her Healing Vocation was the rabbit-hole of Chronic Lyme Disease. We do not judge, for this is a fate that can happen to anyone afflicted with an as-yet-uncharactererised physical malaise, or even some psychological source of distress.

Joining the Lymerati takes special dedication in Australia, for the continent is lacking in Lyme Disease, Acute or otherwise. Though it can boast of a diaspora of shonky clinics where doctors people in lab-coats will happily provide the diagnosis of choice, performing PCR-DNA analysis on a urine sample, or alternatively through dowsing.

So at right is Lucy from a few months ago, announcing her intention to turn professional. The venue was a 'GcMAF Products Australia' FaceBonk group she admins, so the announcement was well-lampshaded and no-one was surprised. Things have changed since GcMAF first arrived on the scene -- when
I am just surprised that Lyme Disease and Morgellons were omitted from the lists of conditions responding to GcMAF.
The FaceBukkake also hosts the "Vector-borne Illness Community Action Network" site, established at the same time -- 
a newly established networking group whose aim is to connect and empower individuals, activities, events, organisations, advocacy and political campaigns within our Australian vector-borne illness community.
Ticks: Much maligned
In a grudging nod to the official reality-based failure to find B. burgdorferi anywhere in the West Island, the title pays lip-service to a broad umbrella coverage of Rickettsia and Ross River Virus and "Lyme-like-diseases"... but you're right, the group is really about Chronic Lyme. The general wish-list is as follows:
  1. Vindication & Recognition of Chronic Lyme self-diagnoses.
  2. Mainstream medicine is evil, and corrupt, and has failed to develop a cure, and the portions are so small.
  3. There should be a vaccine for Lyme Disease, and vaccines are evil.
  4. Long-term IV antibiotics have horrible side-effects -- thanks, Mainstream Medicine! -- and the Lyme-Literate quacks who prescribe them are martyrs to the cause.
  5. Holistic / complementary / functional modalities of healing are the way forward, but our state of incurable disability must be recognised.
Every second post seems to be a heart-warming tale of celebrities who underwent the Road-to-Damascus conversion event and now espouse the Chronic Lyme Cause --
Hadid, who was diagnosed in 2012, underwent the TVAM ( Transvascular Autonomic Modulation) procedure, in which a catheter is inserted into the jugular vein. A balloon is inflated so it stretch the vein, in doing so transferring energy to the nerve fibers along the outside of the vein. The treatment aims to relieve patients of Lyme disease symptoms, including fatigue, cognitive function, energy levels, bladder and bowel function.
The surgery came a few days after Hadid revealed she had consulted with Dr. Dietrich Klinghardt, lead clinician at the Sophia Health Institute in Woodinville, Wash., and the founder and chairman of the Institute for Neurobiology in Germany and Switzerland.
“Homebound with a grateful heart,” Hadid wrote on Instagram Friday. “Thank you Dr. Klinghardt for bringing me to and shining light on the finishing line of my health journey.
...or else it's an advertisement for some scamfest / trades-fair. With occasional advertisements for the wonderful GcMAFplus products from wellnessevolution. Imagine my surprise to find Lucy Corrigan as the admin of the site.

For bonus ensuing hilarity, here's Lucy defending GcMAF from the attempts by Drs Marco Ruggiero and Dietrich Klinghardt to traduce it [the former was instrumental in pushing GfMAF into its current central place in the Alt-Med scammocopoeia, before he renounced it -- realising that anyone could claim to be selling the stuff -- and shifted his enthusiasm to a new product Rerum, compounded from cheap ingredients and under his exclusive control].

The gist is roughly as follows:
-- Rerum is a total rip-off, lacking immunomodulatory properties, and without the Ruggiero-penned scholarly articles in parasitic journals that support GcMAF. GcMAF works, so there is simply no point (other than personal enrichment) in mixing chondroitin with Vitamin D. Anyway those reliable and reputable gentlemen who supply the GcMAFplus also provide a camel-cased but otherwise- identical knockoff product ReViVe, as advertised at my webstore.
-- Klinghardt is a corrupt untrustworthy sell-out who is only disparaging GcMAF because it competes with his own quackery scams as advertised on my VICAN FB site.

Evidently Chronic Lyme Disease increases one's tolerance of cognitive dissonance.
[Thx Dora]

Mud-wrestling pigeon seeks equally-confused chess-playing pig

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The story to accompany this headline is missing, so instead here's a photograph of a 'No Unicorns' sign.

Black swan event: Best 'Top Gear' episode EVAH.

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It is reassuring to know that Volvo autonomous vehicles can identify and avoid elk. Møøse bites Kan be pretti nasti.
The "baffling part" was when
the kangaroos reappeared from behind a hill and launched a barrage of stinger missiles* at the hapless helicopter self-driving vehicle. (Apparently the programmers had forgotten the remove “that” part of the infantry coding).
And we would have got away with it, too, if it weren't for those interfering black swans.

 -----------------------------------------------------------------
* Or some other surrealer ordinance:
“[S]ince we were not at that stage interested in weapons, we had not set any weapon or projectile types, so what the kangaroos fired at us was in fact the default object for the simulation, which happened to be large multicoloured beachballs.”

The transduction serum was increasingly taking hold and treasons were taking place inside his skull which had nothing to do with Boadicea, the Green Exarch or High Earth

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How time flies! Noisily, and trailing a plume of black smoke, in the manner of a coal-burning Nazi pulse-jet war-plane!
It only seems yesterday when the loosely-coordinated bundle or Skandha of impulses and trait-collocations operating for convenience under the single name of 'Smut Clyde' first encounted the 'multiple system' identity / movement...



That is: the old social convention of a single unified personality is so 20th-century... good enough for your uncomplicated parents, but multiple personalities are the new Emo, while the new Black is a shattered mirror

...When in fact, when you add up all our separate fragmentary experiences of duration, it was years ago. Since then, expressions of the trope have left the confines of SF and multiplied within popular culture, like babies occupying a suit of armour, to the extent that the TVTropes entry is not entirely comprehensive.




And at last the phenomenon has made it all the way to Hungary! Ribáry, Lajtai, Demetrovics & Maraz were inspired to frequent the forums and support groups, and to contact six systems for interviews. Or at least that is the excuse they gave.
We are loath to consult the staff list of the Department of Clinical Psychology & Addiction at Eötvös Loránd University to check whether all four authors have separate entries there, preferring to believe that they are alters within a single headspace.

1. Ah, it was a Frontiers journal. Alles klar!

2. Is 'explorative' really a word? If so, it shouldn't be.

3. Any Abstract or Discussion that includes the dreaded words "Further research is needed" needs to stand in the corner and think about what it did wrong, while we subject the reviewers to Hard Stares until they feel flushed, embarrassed and fidgetty.

4. When you confine lots of triangles, circles and rounded squares inside an ellipse, they like to segregate themselves by geometry. Or, as the case may be, by colour.

"A man did not need the transduction serum to be divided against himself — he still had many guilts to accept and not much left of a lifetime to do it in."

Go home, Dr Seuss, you are drunk on stroids again frightening the children with your creepy obsessions

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Rolling rollers
A variety of stuff
Rolling rollers
Rolorous Rolors
Rolling rollers Rolling rollers
Various rolling strokes
Rolling rollers Rolling rollers
Various rolling stroids
Spread a wide range of rolling stroids
Various rolling stroids in a wide range
Spread a wide range of rolling streets
Spread a wide range of rolling stroids
Squeeze your way through a wide range of rolling stocks
Spread a wide range of rolling stroids
Squeeze your way through a wide range of rolling stocks
Spread a wide range behind a variety of rolling stroids
Squeeze your way through a wide range of rolling stocks
Squeeze it with a wide range of items
Stagnate yourself with a wide range of subjects
Variety on various lanes
Variety on various occasions
Variety on everything
Let's do a variety of things,
You can do a variety of things from a variety of people,

Muttony Muco

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Muttony
Muco
Unlikely
Inevitable.

A lukewarm
A rainy season
A dull cloth
A bra bathroom
A blooming thing

Asleep
Asleep
Muddy asleep
Inevulatory seeds
Semi-frail
Semi-dumpling
Inevulatory breadth
Inevulatory as a crown
Inevulatory as a crowd
Inevuligible as a crown.
A crown of cowpea
A crowded crowd.

Elephant Semifics
Evening a cute buttery crown.
A crown of a crowd.

Fickt nicht mit dem Raketenmensch!

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Gather around, younglings, while Uncle Smuts narrate another blood-curdling, spine-chilling, lymph-centrifuging tale of horror and woe. Another cautionary yarn of fictional creation escaping into the realm of consensus reality, or at least into the august pages of the Anglo-American Cyclopaedia [New York, 1917] W.Pedia, which is how these fictive incursions always begin (it must be a tradition, or an old charter or something).

In this case the seminal work of fiction was "German Secret Weapons of World War II"[Samisdat Publishers]. The author, a Bavarian gentleman ycleptErnst Zündel (writing as Christof Friedrich), has elsewhere claimed that he has to make up stupid stuff about Nazi flying saucers at the South Pole because eedjits and barmpots read them, and then he gets invited onto radio shows to talk about his ideas, and he is seldom offered a soapbox on the merits of those ideas themselves (on account of them involving the non-existence of the Holocaust and the misunderstood qualities of Hitler).* This is clearly an excuse, however, and more likely Mr Zündel feels understandable and unassuagable guilt about his fictive inventiveness, which -- like mirrors and procreation -- multiples the superfluity of existence.

Little needs be said about the phantasmic, diesel-fume-delirium nature of the Nazi Himmelstürmer Einpersonnenfluggerät that featured in that pamphlet -- a Nazi jetpack for assisting Heer infantry over minefields and suchlike obstacles, and apparently fueled on Narrativium. Suffice to say that a back-mounted pulsed ramjet has no throttle as such, which makes for an abrupt return to earth after each 50-metre jump; while their absence of activity when not at ram-speed makes ramjets unsuitable for vertical take-off. Also, "The units consumed 100 grams of fuel per second"... yeah right.

The precise sequence and the parties involved in domesticating this wild fantasy are not clear. The germane entry at Grayfalcon.us first came to the attention of the Wayback Machine in September 2007. The author is deeply committed to the notion of Nazi Flying Saucers, so there was nothing about ramjet backpacks that would strain his credulity. Feeling the need for visual corroboration, he provided illustrations, which promptly accreted to the central fantasy and have accompanied it ever since.

In the absence of anything authentic or contemporaneous, our Grayfalcon author amassed one grainy photograph of a child's toy Wehrmacht Action Figure with tubes attached; images of Raketentruppen alt-history figurines and Rocketeer movie-tie-in merchandise; and a sketch in the style of 1960s Eagle or Commando Comix (albeit lacking the canonical speech-bubble expostulations of Englischer Schweinhund!! and Achtung!! Spitfire!!).
Over at the Whackyweedia, WWII Levitation had hovered at the level of childhood movie memories and rumours of war, as a dismissive parenthetical note:
During WWII, Germany made crude early experiments of strapping large firework-type rockets to a man's back; it was very unstable and dangerous.


Until some helpful brownie pasted in the Zündel fabrication on 17 April 2006, fleshing it out with corroborative details to give artistic verisimilitude to the otherwise bald and unconvincing narrative. The Riddled library pixies cannot account for their activities on that day, just saying.
During WWII, Germany made late-war experiments of strapping two wearable shortened Schmidt pulse tubes of low thrust to the body of a test flier. These tunes bore no resemblance to the Schmidt-Argus pulse jet that powered the V-1 missile.
The device was called "Himmelsturmer" (Skystormer) and operated as follows: ... A very simple operation and no report of any casualties.

The notion that American post-war jetpack experimenters stole both concept and technology is especially irresistible. The bit at the end about "no report of any casualties" is true but unhelpful.
Whoops wrong Heaven-Stormer
Those paragraphs remained largely intact for the next seven years... a symbolic period of time, the exact duration of Hans Castorp's sojourn within the Magic Mountain. Grammar purists polished the sentences and gave back "Himmelstürmer" its missing Umlaut, and brought the spurious citations into alignment with Pedia conventions. The passage acquired its own separate subheading... initially "The German Flightpack of World War II". It enjoyed the inevitable though short-lived attentions of lovable scamps who tweaked it to read "The French Flightpack of World War II" (while also changing 'fuel' to 'garbage'), and later provided the device with parentage in the form of Dr Arkle, its purported inventor. Unless these are the vestigial traces of otherwise-suppressed alternative pasts (as predicted by the "Garden of Joining Paths" model of converging time-lines).

Peak Nazi Jetpack churnalism occurred in 2010 -- kicking off with a version at DarkRoastedBlend in April. Not to be outdone, Gizmodo regurged DRB (and the Whackyweedia) in the same month, while DieselPunks simply copy-pasted the Grayfalcon account in July 2010.

At last the bubble burst in Feb. 2013 [thanks to Steve Lehto], and the story fell back into oblivion in the manner of a plummeting Wehrmacht infantryman after Brennschluss. In May the Pedia entry acquired a swift and skeptical footnote:
The story of the Himmelsturmer has recently been revealed to be a fabrication. No such device ever existed. [4]

Then the subsection made a final fleeting curtain-call:
German Himmelstürmer of World War II
Christof Friedrich, a psuedonym for Holocaust denier Ernst Zündel, published an book in 1976 claiming that, in World War II, Germany conducted late-war experiments by strapping two wearable shortened Schmidt pulse jet tubes of low thrust to the body of a pilot [3]. However, outside of the unreliable claims of Zündel, no other evidence exists that these experiments. or that the so-called Himmelstürmer ("sky stormer") program, actually existed. What evidence that Zündel supplied was a hoax[4].

...before it vanished from the Whackyweedia completely, and all agreed to pretend that it never happened.

One is left wondering what other of Mr Zündel's inventions escaped from his fictive containment facilities. Please do not shatter my child-like confidence in the reality of the Lippisch P.13b coal-burning ramjet fighter, or the Horten Ho 229 flying-wing jet bomber.
And in the inevitable sequel, as of October 2016, the unkillable Nazi Zombie Jetpack is back!! -- now with its own separate Pedia entry! And with additional embellishments, bearing that freshly-fabricated new-book smell, about the uniforms worn and the weapons carried by the troopers!**
-------------------------------------------------------
* Mr Zündel's contributions to fiction are not limited to his own creations, for he is also noted for commissioning the Leuchter Report.

** Sadly, in the most recent revision, the author of the entry removed the citation to
Maschek, S. (1950). Kleine Himmelstürmer : Frommfröhliche Lebensbilder f. Kinder. St. Antonius-Verl.
-- belatedly realising that when a Catholic apologist named Salvator Maschek wrote a book called "Little Heaven-Stormer: Pious-Happy Life-Images for Children", it was probably not a memoir about his childhood in the Nazi jetpack infantry.

New product list. Not all mud-related. We apologise to our Chinese customers

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Easy going crazy thoroughly as long as you can not forget.
Nu - Nice - crown - lukewarm college briefcase
Nu - Temple of the Tempura - Temple of the Tempura - Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya
Muayu - The grain of a crown of bread
Mutti - Sexy Eggs - Funny Pictures
Mud Mud Much - A Crown of Mud
Mud Mud - Everyday Evening Girls
Mudguyan - The Mud Blood
Inferiest Mud - Inexpensive Mustard - Inexpensive
Muddy Brown - Muddy Mustache - Inexpensive Must
Inner Muanion - In a crown of lukewarm - a fairy tale
Muay for a breadth of a cowboy - a fairy tale
Inevulable as a crocodile - a crown of bread
A fairy tale - a fairy tale - a fairy tale
A fairy tale - a fairy tale - a soothing crown - a fairy tale
A soothing crisp - a cookie's soothing cowboy
A fairy tale - a fairy tale
A soothing crisp - a cookie as a brief asleep -
A soothing cow - a cookie's solemn tree
A soothing crisp - a cookie's soothing nuisance
A crown of soothing soothing - a brief soothing crown
A soothing crisp - a cookie -
A soothing crisp - a cookie's soothing nuisance
Muddy soothing cranberries - In a crown of soy -
Muddy soothing cranberries - In a crown of soothing nourishment
Coherent soybean paste - In a crowd -
Muddy soothing cranberries - Muddy asleep
Muddy soothing cranberries - In a crowd
Elephant's solemn and cold soya
Coherent soybean paste - an inexanable cream
Coherent soya bean paste - an inexhaustible meat
Muddy Eye Crochet Flower Flowers
Elephant's solemn and elephant's sofa
Muddy ashes africa - an inexhaustible
Muddy Eye Short Sleeve Eye Shape
Elephant Crows Nothing Everyday Everyday Everyday
Must have a crowd as long as a cowboy. This product is not available in Chinese for now.
Easy going crazy thoroughly as long as you can not forget.
[H/t leot and F @ Language Log]


UPDATE: Japanese Horror Movies!

Afloat
A lazy day
Marshy season
Menaceous menaceousness
Marshlands of menace
Matsushiro 's festival
Women's menstrual females, females, females, females

Make sure that it is not broken.
Leave as it is now
While still being pushing up


I remain unconvinced that the city needs a theme bar inspired by the early-Renaissance 'Urine Wheel' tradition

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As is always the case, no-one listens to Uncle Smut.


The shape-shifters grow ever bolder, sire

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Back in the Second Age -- those vanished days of heroism and valiant deeds, before last Tuesday -- Don-Errant Jeffrey Beall used to maintain a list of Replicant Journals. Remember those? Persons unknown would select a niche scholarly journal, modest in ambitions but appearing on Whitelists of legitimate academic outlets (so publishing there is accredited to one's tenure or advancement), slap together a website with that name and identifying ISSN, and advertise that its scope had widened from glaciology or Balkan historical-biographical exegesis to "Science, Engineering, Humanities and Interdisciplinary Research". Then wait for the Processing Fees to roll in from academic wannabees with an urgent need to inflate their CVs.

The result is an entire genre of parasitical printeries... a secondary or irreal creation like something out of Gnostic theology, or like the police precinct staffed wholly by replicants that Decker stumbled upon in Electric Sheep. The websites are designed as write-only storage, not places to store one's submissions where people can read them [although they offer access to their doubtless-existent archives for a mere $2000 because there's one born every minute].
Printery run by poorly-maintained replicants
Beall's list is in abeyance now, though still lingering in archived form. It served the useful purpose of informing desperate faculty members of the Derek Zoolander University for Researchers who Can't Write Good and Wanna Learn to do Other Good Stuff Too, of new places where they could dump their execrable screeds. Dr. Mehrdad Jalalian curates a similar list, current up to 2015.

Of course you remember all that, but it is brought freshly to mind by the appearance here at stately Riddled Manor, flung over the transom, of solicitations for submissions in two freshly scope-widened journals. I am not convinced that 'transom' is really a word, or just something that Another Kiwi made up to rhyme with 'handsome' and 'ransom' in a dirty limerick.


The spammograms are strangely similar in style to earlier solicitations from longer-established shape-shifter projects.
 
Similarities include shared HTML design, in which the journal links, and unsubscribe links, and the concealed tracker code are all laundered through Ukraine-registered domains like "vitym.com" or "rovoni.com".


Editorial panel
The same dramatis personae recur across the editorial panels. There can be few cosmopolitan, multi-talented Renaissance men and women who can switch so easily between glaciology and botany and literary discussion, so the smallness of the name-space is understandable.


But distances and national borders mean nothing in the modern globalised economy of publication grifting. When we go all Scooby-Doo with the forensic web-tracing tools, the domains for all these journals can be found on a server in Chicago, all squeezed into promiscuous propinqity, occupying the same IP address :
Bonus editorial panel
The vast and cool and unsympathetic intellects of the readers will notice that some of the other domains occupying that server -- in dangerously unsanitary and over-crowded conditions -- are not on any list of counterfeit journals. Knowledge-Insights, Researchpioneers, Pioneer-Scientists, Scienceborders... these are old friends of Riddled. They present themselves as "on-line libraries" (or portals) rather than journals, though they follow the same basic business grifting model of receiving payments from both the authors of (say) "A Comparative Study Of Phytochemical Screening In Plant Hemidesmus Indicus (L.) Collected From Different Geographical Regions Of Telangana State" or "Dynimic CAPM Theory Segmented Market", and from the prospective audience, avid to download the fifth or sixth re-publication of these opuscules.

'Portals' are less appealing to authors because the CV-inflation factor = 0. Far be it for me to tell gobshites that they are not gobshiting properly, but the gombeen behind these scams* was probably more successful with the "other other operation" (in which authors send him moneys in exchange for a promise not to publish their papers).

Obviously I'm bitter because “Ruslan Boranbaev” has not seen Stercoria / the Journal of Bullshit Studies as worth counterfeiting.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
* Identified by Dr Jalalian as the pseudonym “Ruslan Boranbaev".

It's almost the deadline Don't miss the deadline, darling

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One of the laziest way to fill a blog-post must be to whine about the annoying spam from predatory-publishing grifters that clogs up the mail-bag here at the Riddled Museum of Salted Pineapples. So here goes, with the shitweasels and skeezebags and latrine-sloths at 'Open Access Text'!

We last met this mockademic outlet when they were providing the antivax autism scammers at AutismOne with a stove-pipe, or a stomach tube rather, to disguise the quality of a tainted on-line survey and pretend to their followers that it was actually a study. Think "human centipede" but with a feeding tube. Then hilarity ensued when the OAfs unpublished Mawson's papers again until his sponsors coughed up more money.

OAText are Navaneeth Reddy and his partner Khalid Mohammad, based in Hyderabad, because where else would they be? Though they dropped the diagnostic "Greetings for the Day!" salutation from their spam and launder everything through Reddy's company "ResearchWallet", to present themselves as operating out of the UK, in the belief that a London address endows them with gravitas and credibility. We try to lock them out, adding their Sender addresses to the blocked-domain-name list, but the OAfs keep adding new domains to squirm past the spam filter.

They are persistently concerned that I might miss the deadline, and miss the wunnderful opportunity to give them moneys publish through their science-reportage outhouse.
----------------------------------------------------------------
From: Kathy Allison [mailto:editor@ophthalmicjournal.org]
Sent: Friday, December 09, 2016 12:48 AM
Subject: [SPAM]Follow up e-mail by Editorial Office


Dear Colleague,
I didn’t hear back from you about the e-mail which was sent to you few weeks back; hence making a follow up.
I am writing this e-mail with reference to your article published in the field of Ophthalmology.
Our team highly appreciate your work. Based on the same, New Frontiers in Ophthalmology (NFO) team welcomes you to submit your new articles. We are sure your article would aid in escalating the standards of our journal.
I welcome you to submit the article to submissions@oatext.com
Please let me know your interest in publishing with NFO.
With appreciation,
Kathy Allison
Managing Editor
for Prof. James B. Aguayo-Martel
Editor in Chief
----------------------------------------------------------------
From: New Front Ophthalmol [mailto:ophthalmology@oatextjournals.com]
Sent: Wednesday, December 14, 2016 7:04 AM
Subject: Notification from Editorial Office: Please reply

Dear Colleague
Recently we have sent you an e-mail but didn’t receive any reply; hence making a follow up.
We are contacting you with the reference of your recently published article.  Our team has read your article with great interest and wish if you could publish your upcoming articles in our journal New Frontiers in Ophthalmology (NFO).
You can send us your submissions at submissions@oatext.com
Please take a few minutes to let us know your concerns regarding publication.
Awaiting your reply.
With appreciation,
Kathy Allison
Managing Editor
for Prof. James B. Aguayo-Martel
Editor in Chief
----------------------------------------------------------------
From: James B Aguayo-Martel [mailto:editor@medicalopenaccess.com]
Sent: Thursday, January 12, 2017 3:37 AM
Subject: Upcoming Issue Submission Alerts: New Frontiers in Ophthalmology

Dear Colleague,
We are contacting certain eminent researchers who have recently published high quality article in the field of ophthalmology. Its our pleasure to recommend our journal New Frontiers in Ophthalmology(NFO) for your upcoming articles.
NFO follows fast peer-review process (7-10 days) and rapid publication of the articles.
Kindly submit your article to our editorial office by email to submissions@oatext.com
We appreciate your prompt response and attention regarding your interest in publishing with NFO.
Awaiting your reply.
With Appreciation,
Kathy Allison
Editorial Assistant
For
James B Aguayo-Martel
Editor-in-Chief
New Frontiers in Ophthalmology


You are receiving this email because of your relationship with the sender. To safely unsubscribe or modify your subscription settings please click here
----------------------------------------------------------------
From: Kathy Allison [mailto:editor@oatextjournals.info]
Sent: Thursday, June 22, 2017 8:47 PM
Subject: Second e-mail: Discounted_Fee_Ophthalmology

Dear Colleague,
Recognizing your very busy schedule, I am sending you this follow up e-mail.
New Frontiers in Ophthalmology (NFO) is now accepting submissions for its upcoming issue. Knowing your expertise in the related field, it would be our pleasure to review your work for publication in NFO. We are sure your quality articles would raise the standards of our journal.
Upon special consideration, all the articles submitted before June 28th, 2017 will be subjected for the discount in the publication fee.
You can send us your articles to ophthalmology@oatextjournals.com
Regards
Kathy Allison
Editorial Assistant
For
New Frontiers in Ophthalmology
You are receiving this email because of your relationship with the sender. To safely unsubscribe or modify your subscription settings please click here
----------------------------------------------------------------
From: Kathy Allison [mailto:editor@oatextjournal.net]
Sent: Thursday, July 13, 2017 6:20 PM
Subject: Follow up on previous e-mail: Kindly Reply

Dear Author,
We have contacted you few weeks back but didn’t receive any reply; hence making a follow up.
We are contacting few researchers whose published work is novel to the current literature of Ophthalmology. We appreciate your work and hence recommending our journal New Frontiers in Ophthalmology (NFO) for publication of your new articles by July 25th, 2017 or let us know your tentative date for submission.
We welcome you to submit the article tosubmissions@oatext.com
We look forward for your positive reply.
With appreciation,
Kathy Allison
Editorial Assistant
For
New Frontiers in Ophthalmology


You are receiving this email because of your relationship with the sender. To safely unsubscribe or modify your subscription settings please click here
----------------------------------------------------------------
It might never have occurred to readers that "unsubscribing or modifying subscriptions" could be UNSAFE if it were not for these turdwaffles' reassurance that the unsubscription link is perfectly safe, no toxic HTML code there, promise! OAText were early-adopters of the addition of tracker code to their spam, to inform them when a recipient was foolish enough to read it and could be stalked with creepy targetted demands.

"Kathy Allison" is probably a $NAME parameter for a spam-script. but the Editor at least, James Aguayo-Martel, is a genuine facsimile of a human being. He is not an innocent victim of dirtball grifters appropriating his name for their shoddy little scam... he writes their Editorials, while his LinkedIn accountboasts of his association with them, perhaps under the impression that the title of "Editor-in-Chief of a Journal-Shaped Pukebag" adds lustre to his reputation.

Dr Martel further burnishes his CV with an impressive range of roles at other spammy, scammy predaceous & parasitical journals -- Associate Editor and Honorable Editor at MedCrave, Editor at ECronicon, Editor at 'JOJO' from Juniper, Editor at OpenVentio, Associate Editor at "Annals of International Medical and Dental Research". Perhaps he is hoping to qualify for the title of 'Hyderabad Honorary Consul'. He does not boast of these low-life collaborations in his self-written Whackyweedia entry, however, so perhaps a vestigial sense of shame lingers still.

Dr Martel has been advised that the dregs of humanity are traducing his good name by signing it at the bottom of their griftograms, but he does not respond to well-meaning Riddled emails.
------------------------------------------------------------------------
AFTERTHOUGHT: Jeffrey Beall speculated about the similarities between the OAText and OMICS operations. A commenter confirmed that Navaneeth Reddy had worked at OMICS before going into the business himself, wondering why he should work his fingers to the bone defrauding strangers on behalf of a boss when he could keep those strangers' money for himself.

The two scam-shops seem to maintain a collegial relationship, and Beall noted the ostensible existence of one Amanda Venis, a high-functioning $NAME parameter who works both sides of the street. "Her"FaceBukkake page primarly peddles one of the dismal OAText travesties (Global Derpatology) but the advertisements that comprise "her"Twitter stream alternate between that journal and the Journal of Figmentary Disorders from OMICS. Of the three LinkedIn entries set up in that name, one has her working in SF as an Editorial Assistant for OMICS, while the other two have her in London, as OAText Managing Editor for Global Dermatology or, possibly, for the Interdiciplinary Journal of Chemistry.

It is increasingly difficult to come up with new ways of saying "sketchy OMICS-wannabee grifters operating out of an apartment in Hyderabad"

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Dream work in Malaya
Dear Mystery Author:
You should probably be aware that when you submit your literature review on “Benefits of Dream Work for the Dying”to a predatory publisher like Herald Scholarly Open Access Journals -- which is to say, three sketchy OMICS-wannabee grifters operating out of an apartment in Hyderabad -- they send it out to grumpy but unqualified strangers like me, so we can point and laugh at it.

The Dream Work of Unknown Kadath
Dear Dr.,
Warm greetings from the Journal of Alternative, Complementary & Integrative Medicine!

We would like to take an opportunity and introduce the Journal of Alternative, Complementary & Integrative Medicine as one of the journals of Herald Scholarly Open Access. We are in the process of releasing an upcoming issue.

We would like to invite you to peer review a manuscript for the Journal of Alternative, Complementary & Integrative Medicine. The manuscript entitled “Benefits of Dream Work for the Dying” with the reference number HACIM-17-019 abstract is given below; please let us know your opinion to review it. If you accept to review the manuscript, then we will send you the full length article.

Abstract:

This paper provides an examination of the effects of dream work on patients facing end of life. The literature reviewed is an exploration of the value of interaction with dreams though guided dream work techniques as well as using surveys and interviews. Quality of life, comfort, and psychological well-being associated with dream work will also be explored. Additionally, the author will review the research on how dreams and dream content help to mediate the existential crisis faced by those at end of life. The author's goal is to provide evidence to support the integration of dream work into the existing complementary and integrative practices for palliative care and to highlight the need for further research.

Please feel free to contact us for any queries.

Anticipating your reply

With Best Regards
Emma Lynch
Herald Scholarly Open Access
2561 Cornelia Rd
#205, Herndon, VA 20171
USA
Tel: +1-646-661-6626
---------------------------------------------------------------------
I have watched "Jacob's Ladder", "Carnival of Souls", "Reeker", "Dead End", "Stay" and mumblety-mumble other examples of that whole "Incident at Owl Creek" genre of death-dream horror movie, but that is probably not the kind of "dream work for patients facing end of life" that you have in mind.

The possibility did come to mind that if Mystery Author is not greatly concerned about associating with scammers and fraudsters if he or she is sending the manuscript to a journal of Alternative, Complementary & Integrative Medicine.
Herald [note Anglo-Saxon attitude]
The Herald barmpots are slightly more clear on the concept of "peer review" than when they scrounged for input from D.H. Kaye:
if you do not want to review this paper, kindly let us know your opinion on the same so that we can send you full length article
However, they failed to invite me to join the Prestigious Editorial Board:
As the one of eminent scientific personalities, we invite you to associate with us as an editor. We believe your association will help for the journal growth and development.
Insulted now.

It seems from the other domains staked out by Ashok Kumar that the Herald crew aspire to branch out from parasitical publishing to the more lucrative lurk of organisingparasiticalscamferences.

Still working through the backlog of irritating mockademic-journal spam

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Rajesh Varma -- the egregious fuckknuckle who came up with the respect-inspiring title "PeerTechz" when he leapt aboard the parasitic-publishingband-wagon juggernaut -- is evidently making so little money from the scam that he cannot afford last names for his "Managing Editor" sockpuppets. Leaving them to languish in initial-letter anonymity.
Juggernaut Clown-car

From: Peertechz Journal of Bioinformatics and Biostatistics [mailto:editor.pjbb@ptjmail.com]
Sent: Friday, July 21, 2017 2:42 AM
Subject: Publish your valuable work with us: PJBB

Dear Dr.,

Hope this mail finds you in good spirits.
We are pleased to inform you that Peertechz Journal of Bioinformatics and Biostatistics is under the process of accepting articles from the experts like you for Upcoming Issue.
We will be grateful if you submit a paper for the upcoming issue, the submission due date for the article is 04th August 2017.
Kindly submit your manuscript to our editorial office mail.bioinformatics@peertechz.com   
We request you to let us know your possibility of submitting an article.
Best Regards,
Nirmal Y
Journal Managing Editor
Editorial Office: #202, NVS Central, Hi-tech City
R.R District, Hyderabad-500018, TS, India
Tel: +91 40 23833479
Email: mail(dot)bioinformatics(at)peertechz(dot)com;
biostatistics(dot)peertechz(at)gmail(dot)com

Please Note: If this journal is not related to your expertise, please notify us. If you do not want to hear from us please unsubscribe
--------------------------------------------
Expert in the field
By "Experts like me" as contributors, I guess he means "unqualified and uninterested outsiders". But at least he has stopped pretending that "this spam message n'est pas une spam message", as featured in previous endeavours.
--------------------------------------------
From: Journal of Novel Physiotherapy and Physical Rehabilitation [mailto:editor.jnppr@ptjonline.com]
Sent: Friday, July 07, 2017 10:02 PM
Subject: Your manuscript on Novel Physiotherapy is of immense value: JNPPR

Hello Dr.,

Hope this letter finds you in good spirits and in epic of your researching endeavours.

I am Vishwa A from Journals Handling Department of Journal of Novel Physiotherapy and Physical Rehabilitation (ISSN: 2455-5487).

The aim of the Journal is to publish scientific research knowledge and works of eminent scholars in order to assist further researches.
We request you to send your valuable works on or before 18th July, 2017 on the following mail-ID: mail.rehabilitation@peertechz.comor for online submission system, click Submit Paper.
If it is not possible to submit by the last date, then please let us know your tentative date of manuscript submission.
It will be a great pleasure to publish your works with us. We look forward to get a positive response from you.
Best Regards,
Vishwa A
Journal Managing Editor
Editorial Office: #202, NVS Central, Hi-tech City,
R.R District, Hyderabad-500018, TS, India
Tel: +91 40 23833479
Email: mail(dot)rehabilitation(at)peertechz(dot)com;
rehabilitation(dot)peertechz(at)gmail(dot)com 
Please Note: If this journal is not related to your expertise, please notify us. If you do not want to hear from us please unsubscribe
---------------------------------------------------
Does "Novel physiotherapy" mean "physiotherapy involving works of fiction", or "works of fiction about physiotherapy"? If the former, my copy of "Joseph and his Brothers" probably weighs enough to use in a cardiovascular exercise program. If the latter, I shall have to borrow Another Kiwi's dog-eared six-volume illustrated edition of "Adventures of Nina the Naughty Masseuse".
---------------------------------------------------
From: Annals of Alzheimers and Dementia Care [mailto:editor.aadc@ptjmail.net]
Sent: Friday, June 02, 2017 10:19 PM
Subject: Join hands with prompt publishing services: AADC

Peertechz Publications Private Limited
Hello Dr.,
Annals of Alzheimer's and Dementia Care provides an optimized knowledge to scientific communityand to promote qualitative research publications.
The journal is inviting you to submit your research works on Alzheimer's and related disciplines for the upcoming issue.
Interested in publishing your valuable works? Send it within 3 days on following mail-ID: mail.alzheimers@peertechz.comor for online submission system, click Submit Paper
Your manuscript will be published without publication fees if you send it within stipulated timeframe of 3 days. You will have to bear only nominal service charges at the time of final publication.
We look forward to publish your valuable works.
All the best for your ongoing research!
Best regards,
Hardev B
Journal Managing Editor
Editorial Office: #202, NVS Central, Hi-tech City
R.R District, Hyderabad-500018, TS, India
Tel: +91 40 23833479
Email: alzheimersdementia(dot)peertechz(at)gmail(dot)com

Please Note: If this journal is not related to your expertise, please notify us. If you do not want to hear from us please unsubscribe
---------------------------------------------------
From: Journal of Clinical Research and Ophthalmology [mailto:editor.jcro@ptjmail.com]
Sent: Friday, February 24, 2017 1:11 AM
Subject: We value your hard work: JCRO

Reference No: GENT003
Dear Dr.,
Journal of Clinical Research and Ophthalmology (ISSN: 2455-1414) wishes you success and prosperity throughout the Year 2017.
The journal takes an opportunity to gauge the goal of ethical publishing and invite you to send your articles for the upcoming issue.
Topics to be covered: Gastric Cancer; Stomach Diseases; Colorectal Cancer; Nonalcoholic Fatty Liver Disease; Paediatric IBD; IBD Causes and Symptoms; IBD & Cancer; IBD & Pregnancy; IBD Treatment; Stomach Diseases; Primary Biliary Cirrhosis; Neuroendocrine tumor; Irritable Bowel Syndrome; Upper GI Complaints etc..
You are hereby requested not to reply on the sender E-Mail ID.
Please reply to this mail on following mail-ID: mail.ophthalmology@peertechz.com orSubmit Paper(for paper submission)
Moreover, raise standards of scientific research worldwide, we have come up with membership programme. For further details, please visit:
https://www.peertechz.com/membership
Your contribution towards the journal will certainly enhance its visibility and impact thereby increasing the value of online publishing.
Please specify the ‘Reference Number’ of the letter in future communications.
Best regards,
Saurabh R
Journal Managing Editor
Editorial Office
Tel: +91 40 23833479,
Email: mail.ophthalmology@peertechz.com ; ophthalmology1.peertechz@gmail.com
#202, NVS Central, Hi-tech City, R.R District, Hyderabad-500018, TS, India.
Note: If this journal is not related to your expertise, please notify us. If you do not want to hear from us please unsubscribe
---------------------------------------------------
Rajesh has a business style which relies on community shareware and begging for free advice in preference to reading the manual. Other plaudits for his obsequious incompetence come from PhytoBotanist, Nigel Armfield, and FlakyJ.

The illiterate cockwomble at "ScientificFederation"[i.e. ReddySekhar] is a different kettle of red herrings flock of Spambirds. He deals with the unaffordable price of surnames by composing his Assistant Scientific Editor sockpuppets from two first names.

From: SciFed Nursing & Healthcare Journal [mailto:editorial.sfnhj@scifed.com]
Sent: Friday, July 07, 2017 3:47 AM
Subject: Call for Papers-Nursing & Healthcare

Dear Dr.,
Greetings from SciFed.

SciFed Nursing & Healthcare Journal would like to invite you to publish your recent research on Nursing & Healthcare for the inaugural issue. SciFed Nursing & Healthcare Journal has been established with the help of honorable editorial team from all over the world. Our main aim is to disseminate the high quality articles to the scientific world with minimal price barriers and to climb up the ladder of impact factor.

It would be great if you could submit article so that we could process it for the Upcoming Inaugural Issue. SciFed Nursing & Healthcare Journal accepts articles in the form of Research Articles/Review Articles/Case Reports/Short Communications etc.
If your current research is suitable for SciFed Nursing & Healthcare Journal, kindly click here to submit your manuscript through online.
Kindly avail this opportunity to share your scientific excellences and be a part of our esteemed organization.

We will be glad to assist you, if you have any concerns

Have a nice and healthy day ahead.

Best Regards,
Alexander Isaac
Assistant Scientific Editor
E:editorial.sfnhj@scifed.com
T: +91-779-979-0002
You are subscribed to Scientific Federation as XXX. If you do not wish to receive any further communications, please click here.
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From: SciFed Journal of Neuroscience [mailto:editorial.sfjn@scifed.com]
Sent: Friday, July 07, 2017 3:32 AM
Subject: Call for Papers-Neuroscience

Dear Dr.,
Greetings from SciFed.

SciFed Journal of Neuroscience would like to invite you to publish your recent research on Neuroscience for the inaugural issue.SciFed Journal of Neuroscience has been established with the help of honorable editorial team from all over the world. Our main aim is to disseminate the high quality articles to the scientific world with minimal price barriers and to climb up the ladder of impact factor.

It would be great if you could submit article so that we could process it for the Upcoming Inaugural Issue. SciFed Journal of Neuroscience accepts articles in the form of Research Articles/Review Articles/Case Reports/Short Communications etc.
If your current research is suitable for SciFed Journal of Neuroscience, kindly click here to submit your manuscript through online.

Kindly avail this opportunity to share your scientific excellences and be a part of our esteemed organization.

We will be glad to assist you, if you have any concerns

Have a nice and healthy day ahead.

Best Regards,
Ivan Connor
Assistant Scientific Editor
E: 
editorial.sfjn@scifed.com
T: +91-779-979-0002

You are subscribed to Scientific Federation as XXX. If you do not wish to receive any further communications, please click here.
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Also Henry Nicholas, Jean Paul, Samantha Lauren, Emilia Michelle, et cetera. The predictable result has been to create an underclass or Dumpenproletariat of SciFed Assistant-Scientific-Editor sockpuppets who have LinkedIn accounts but no actual names at all.

I was not previously aware of my expertise in the closely-associated fields of nursing and neuroscience, or even nurseroscience as it may be [h/t Fish].
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