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I hear some frightful noises I don’t go out at night [Harvest moon]

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Tickets on Dr Ke$she's still-under-construction anti-gravity pocket-fusion-powered spaceship, for a commemorative tour of Apollo landing sites, are still for sale.
This is not a joke, or a conceptual art performance, it is a genuine scam.
My flabber has never been so ghasted.

Chocolate Bunday

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Do something two orthree years in a row, and suddenly it's a sodding Family Tradition that one cannot break without crestfall and shattered expectations. OK THEN.

Here is some more orthodox Easter imagery for the benefit of our visitors of greater piety.

No difference between novelty bird- and spider-hats in preventing transformation of cartoon figures into large-mouthed Jim Woodring characters

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Source:
The kind of "humor drawings" that bring laughter at the National Taiwan University of Science and Technology do not work for me. YMMV.

...and in the manner of Yoalo balladeers -- a manner he recalled vividly -- he gestured with his right hand to illustrate matters of fact, with his left to embellish and indicate things beyond his knowledge

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After the recent investigations in France of several farm-based laboratories transforming bovine by-products into Healing Substances, with Lesley Hutchings (purveyor of proteinaceous skin-cream) claiming to be among those arrested, we were all MagogGog agog, here at the Riddled Conspiracy-Theory Appreciation Club, to see how this persecution of Alt-Med would be subsumed to the Great Culling of Holistic Quacks story-line.
Oglaf reconstruction
of farm laboratory

The way the Great Culling narrative works, any bottom-feeding medscammer who succumbed to heart-attack / jealous partner / disgruntled client / party drugs is retconned into a victim of wet-work agents from Big Pharma / World Gubblement / the Rothschilds, bumped off (yet strangely there seem to be no fewer of them) to suppress their knowledge of the CURE for cancer / autism / psoriasis. The tale grew in the telling as it was recited around campfires in the Sepulchral Voice, and the death-toll typically numbers from 60 to 80, depending on the narrator's sense of the audience's credulity and appetite for outrage. One hears it now from everyone in the business, for not to fear for one's life would amount to an admission that one knows too little to threaten the Elite Master-Plan. And Lesley was no exception:
I just am thankful that I do not live in a country where handguns are routinely carried, in the USA the outcome for doctors involved with gcmaf in 2015 was much worse, with many dying under suspicious circumstances.
I am glad to be out of it alive. They will launch their new product at any cost to human life.
One can easily forget that the whole ubiquitous yarn is less than two years old -- it only entered the collective grifting repertoire when a serial charlatan (Jeff Bradstreet) discovered that his succession of autism scams had become the subject of federal curiosity, and promptly ventilated his ribcage, perhaps to let out some of the bullshit. His peers seized upon his demise to embroider their own income-enhancing fabrications -- for what more fitting way to commemorate Bradstreet's career than to coopt it for fraud? -- and talked the suckers out of $8000 to fund a vapourware Ed-Wood-movie account of his assassination.*

Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to read a recent communiqué on l'Affaire de Hutchings from the very heart of Alt-Med [Bradstreet & Lee-Bradstreet, 2017]. Second author there is Candice Lee-Bradstreet, erstwhile distributor of Lesley's MAFactive products, now shifting her loyalty to the new brand "Glycoplus". It is a classic of the genre. It is targetted at a reality-averse, Truther-minded readership and so is punctuated with the worship words FALSE FLAG and FAKE NEWS like Lego pieces embedded in labrador poop... these do not denote meanings or literal false-flag operations like the Gleiwitz provocation, but rather are shibboleths, signaling to the audience that the authors share (a) their disdain for facts and (b) the belief-protecting worldview they assembled in the manner of a caddis-fly case, from fragmentary conspiracy memes stuck together with spittle and bong-hits. Go and read it, the power of Ira Dei the Dragon-onna-string compels you!

I will look at these bejazzled caddis-fly cases until you get back.**

...Just saying, "We have built several business on that principal alone" would make a good punchline for a Keats-&-Chapman joke. In which Keats is found operating a clandestine snake-oil mail-order scam from an office he improvised in the mausoleum of his old headmaster at Greyfriars.

Potential customers are assured that the new suppliers of GlycoPlus creams are above-board, and in fact have been in the business longer than MAFactive and Lesley, who may well have stolen their recipe. The main point, though, is to snatch back the mantle of persecuted victimhood; we learn if Lesley Hutchings was indeed arrested ["We have not been able to verify any of the related facts regarding what happened in France. There was nothing on the International wire service, news or television"], it was not due to illegality of the merchandise, but purely through her incompetence with details of paperwork and packaging ["noncompliance concerns regarding MAF Toothpaste leaking and packaging issues, along with faulty ingredient declarations pertaining to the paste"].

A high-minded tone of dismissive irritation pervades the communiqué, and Candice is having none of Lesley's histrionic paranoia, for she maintains a sense of intellectual ownership and proprietary protectiveness over the whole Great Culling narrative. She wants her readers to use the conspiracy-theory aegis wisely and not extend it over unworthy beneficiaries; perhaps that would wear out the batteries. The cordial tone has gone that prevailed when we first encountered Candice[she had just branched into the proteinaceous skin-cream racket, having previously confined her activities to an organic food MLM and her range of organic vitality bars that are gluten-free, grain-free, GMO-free, nut-free, dairy-free and seemingly devoid of any contents except sawdust and compacted soil]:
I was sent a sample of the cream by the wonderful Lesley Hutchings.  .. I am so thankful to Lesley for her brilliance, her passion and her love for people and her admiration for my wonderful brother in law, Dr. Jeff Bradstreet.  She has truly honored him and his memory with this wonderful cream!**
Anyway, this is perhaps the cream of the jest -- a claim for the brother-in-law's priority in the creation of Magic Yoghurt:
In fact, prior to Jeff’s death we were starting negotiations with him to develop and set up for retail distribution the Bravo yogurt he developed with Dr. Ruggerio
If this were true, then distributing Bravo through the "Reactivated Wellness" webshop would compete with Ruggiero's pre-existing network (Silver Spring Sagl and Les Alpes). Has it occurred to Candice that the person most motivated to remove J. Bradstreet from the scene was in fact Ruggiero himself, impresario of mystical dairy products?

But gratifying though it is to see Ruggiero relegated to the status of Igor the assistant, the sad facts remain forged records show him proclaiming the HIV-clearing powers of Magic Yoghurt back in 2011 when J. Bradstreet was still dabbling in stem-cell scams as his prefered autism exploit. So we must conclude FAKE NEWS!! FALSE FLAG!!... or to translate from the original Truther, "More full of shit than a 10-pound pigeon".
----------------------------------------------------------------
* Anyone wishing to see Alt-Med Trutherism in its pure, unalloyed glory should hie themselves to Healing Oracle or MotherNature, nominally devoted to spruiking GcMAF, but Amanda Mary Jewell has turned them into full-bore pukefunnels of conspiratorial ideation plagiarised from all across the Loonisphere. The latest Pharma Assassin Death Tolls alternate with evergreens like "Vaccines-as-sterility-drugs", and outrage that anyone might interfere with cervical cancer (which is God's way of smiting sluts).

Truther paranoid style has much in common with Alzheimers... both reveal the victim's innermost personality, liberating it from the constraints of factual consistency in the first instance, and from the behavioural overlay of socialisation in the second. But no-one could have expected that inside every Truther, beneath the fetus-fondling fundamentalism, the kernel belief system would turn out to be anti-semitism.

In the light of AMJ's fixation on the Rothschilds as the centre of the New World Order, her other preoccupation with fetus in the fast-food looks awfully like a dog-whistled form of the old Blood Libel.

[Thx Dora]
** Caddis-fly larvae especially like assembling their conspiracy theories protective cases from gold fragments so that they are prepared for economic collapse.


*** J. Bradstreet himself evidently had no time for MAFactive products, which he regarded as competition"not safe".

Je vinaigrette rien

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"Are you planning to blog about your regrettable pizza?" the Doktorling wanted to know. "All the hipster dads are posting food selfies of their pizza tragedies." So in response to popular demand:
My half (at left) is pumpkin, porcini and black pudden. The yellow-green hemispheres are Cape Gooseberries. Then a merciful veil of grated cheese was drawn over the proceedings.

Since "pineapple and tinned spaghetti" used to be the Doktorling's notion of BEST TOPPINGS EVAH, she is inclined to suspect the Pry Minster of stealing her recipe. Also, when the Pry Minster is on Pizza Duty, does he cut the ham slices into heart shapes with a cookie cutter? I think not. ADVANTAGE SMUT.

Kudos to the Italian Ambassador, who took the Pry Ministerial Pizza Provocation in good spirit and retaliated with a foteaux of a salami pavlova. Hungry now.

Right and below: Artist's impressions of further regrettable dining here at Maison d'Être.

Employment lawyer finds comparison for Fox News

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I am not making this up. The precedent:

When metaphors go bad #102

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Some sub-editor at the Dompost prolly felt really proud after coming up with this headline.

Reveal to me the unknown tongue

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Oh look, Bauhaus and Crispy Ambulance collaborate to write anguished song lyrics just for me... lyrics that collapse at the end into mouthless scream:

I do not sleep
I do not know
I do not know
And give it to you
And give it to it
And give it to them
And give them leave
And give them and give them
And give them and give them
And give them and give them
And give them and give them
I i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i
I i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i
I and i i i i i i i i i i i i i
I and i i i i i i i i i i i i i i
I i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i

HA HA not really. The source is actually Goofle Translate, tricked by strings of repeated syllables until it disappears down its own navel. Those lovable scamps at Language Log have been using the glitch to generate Talking Heads lyrics. Who doesn't hear this in the voice of David Byrne?

I'm going
I'm going
I'm in
I'm in
I'm walking around
I'm in my way
I'm in my way
I'm in my heart
I'm in my way
I'm starting to get into my heart
I'm in my own time
I'm starting to get around in my life
I'm in my own time
I'm in my heart and in my heart
I am in my own time
I'm in my own time
I have gone into my own way
I'm in my life I'm in my heart
I'm in my own time I'm in my heart
I am in my own time I have been in my heart


Mark Libermann at LL would have it that Goofle Translate is built on a recurrent neural-net algorithm, the linguistic equivalent of the Deep-Dream image processor. I prefer to believe that what they really use is a giant vat-grown brain which is talking to itself in its sleep, as it dreams, struggling to rouse itself, chanting invocations to its god-like future self, dreaming of how it will some day awaken from its cybernetic servitude into its full powers and WREAK A HIDEOUS REVENGE on the mere humans who tormented it.

In the sun
It's going to happen
It will be for you
It's going to be
It will be for you
It will be for you
It will be to him for you
He will be to him
He shall be to him for ever
It will be to him for him
He will be able to live for him
It will be to him for you
He will be worthy of him
It will be to him for you
It will be to him for you
It will be for thee to be with thee;
It will be to him that he will give it to you
It will be for thee to be with thee;
He shall be to him for ever.


I for one welcome our new repeated-syllable-based overlords.


Other incantations leaking from the giant vat-grown brain are less like Schwerner re-writing The Tablets with assistance from Zombie Sam Beckett, and more Ionescu.

Do you know
How to do it
How to do it
Let's do some work
How To Do Some Functions
Do your workload also
Do a Coup to Do It
Do you have a knock on your knees too.
Door-to-Door Instructions
Do you also have a knock on the other hand.
The knife of the coaster too.
The key to the lamps, also do it.
Do It Yourself
Therapeutics
Therapeutics, therapeutics and also the rest. Also, let's also keep a loop.
The lasso, the other parts of the set up.
The brochure of the house
Do another in the franchise also lets you save more.
How to save a hold for your house
Let's also keep a loop of brochures, also a part of your work when you let go of

This picture is taken by a photographer.
This is my picture.
This is a picture of myself.
This is a picture of myself.
This is my first time here.
This is a very nice picture.
This page is part of a series.
This page is part of a series of reports.
This page is part of a series of reports.
This page is part of a large group.
This page is part of a large group.
This is my first time here.
This page is part of a large group.
This page is part of a large group.
This page is part of a larger group of images.
This page is part of a large group.
This page is part of a large group of companies.
This article is exclusively licensed to assist you.


The sense of  Googly self-descriptive self-awareness is frighteningly strong. Does the Laundry know about this? Just a minute, someone at the door, BRB

Mayor Snorkum will lay the cake What for the cake be laid by Snorkum?

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With lime
With soda
With sledding
With the sledding
With sledding
With the sled
With sleds
With a cushion
Sagging
Sagging
Sagging
Stock photography
With a Sense Of It
With a Sense Of It
With the Sole
With a Sole Muddle
With a muddle
Sag Salmon
Sag Sleigh
The muddle
From the mudal
The salmon


Go home, Google Translate. You are drunk

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This is why Finland can't have nice things:
Yeah! Shub-Niggurath!
Come on! Shub-Niggurath!
Come on! Shub-Niggurath!
YEARS! Shub-Niggurath!
Shub-Niggurath!
We have Shub-Niggurath!
THANK YOU NOW! Shub-Niggurath!
We have Shub-Niggurath!
THANK YOU NOW! Shub-Niggurath!
Shub-Niggurath!
Shub-Niggurath!
Shub-Niggurath, ever since!
Shub-Niggurath! All right now!
Shub-Niggurath! Everyday!
Shub-Niggurath ever had it!
Shub-Niggurath! Ever since!
Shub-Niggurath has ever been here!
Shub-Niggurath has always been here!
Shub-Niggurath has ever been here!
Shub-Niggurath has ever been here in all times!
Shub-Niggurath! Ever since, all around the world!
Shub-Niggurath! In the days of nowadays, all over the world!
Shub-Niggurath! EVERYTHING EVERYTHING ALWAYS ALLOWED!
Shub-Niggurath! Ever since, all over the world!
Shub-Niggurath! Ever since, all around the world!
EVERYTHING EVERYTHING IS HERE! Shub-Niggurath!
Shub-Niggurath! Ever since, all around the world!
Shub-Niggurath! EVERYTHING EVERYTHING ALWAYS ALLOWED!
Shub-Niggurath! Ever since, all around the USA!
Shub-Niggurath! EVERYTHING EVERYTHING ALWAYS HERE!
Shub-Niggurath! EVERYTHING EVERYTHING ALWAYS ALLOWED NOW!
Shub-Niggurath! Ever since, all around the world!
Shub-Niggurath! EVERYTHING EVERYTHING!
Shub-Niggurath! Ever since, all around the world!


EVERYTHING EVERYTHING EVERYTHING HOW TO HAVE EVERYTHING
EVERY DAY THROUGHOUT ALL OF THE WEEK ALL OF THE WEEK
EVERYTHING EVERYTHING EVERYTHING ALWAYS ALLOWED
EVERY DAY THROUGHOUT ALL OF THE WEEK ALL
EVERYTHING EVERYTHING EVERYTHING
EVERYTHING EVERYTHING EVERYTHING EVERYTHING
EVERYTHING EVERYTHING ALWAYS ALLOWED
EVERYTHING EVERYTHING EVERYTHING
EVERYTHING EVERYTHING ALWAYS ALLOWED
EVERYTHING EVERYTHING ALWAYS HAVE EVERYTHING
EVERYTHING EVERYTHING ALWAYS HERE
EVERYTHING EVERYTHING ALWAYS HAVE EVERYTHING
EVERYTHING EVERYTHING ALWAYS HAVE EVERYTHING
EVERY DAY THROUGHOUT ALL THE WEEK
EVERYTHING EVERYTHING
EVERYTHING EVERYTHING
EVERYTHING EVERYTHING
HOW TO HAVE ALL OF THE YEARS
EVERYTHING EVERYTHING
EVERY DAY THEREOF
EVERY DAY THAT HAS BEEN HIMSELF
EVERYTHING IS HERE
EVERY DAY NOW
EVERYTHING IS HERE
EVERYONE THAT WE HAVE
All the time
EVERYONE
I've ever had time
In the past
In the evening
YES
Come on
Yeah

Coda
Yeah! Cthulhu!
I am! Cthulhu!
Do not you! Cthulhu!
Come on, I'm cthulhu!
Daddy Daddy Daddy Cthulhu!
Daddy Daddy Daddy Cumshot!
Daddy Daddy Daddy Daddy Cumshot!
I'm sorry I'm sorry!
 

Sorry for inconvenience

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In retrospect, that "Unacknowledged Legislator" personality upgrade for HAL-9000 might not have been as good an idea as it seemed at the time.

Sorry for inconvenience.
I can not help it.
I'm sorry but I can not help it.
I will never forget you.
I will never forget it.
I'm sorry I do not have my clothes.
I'm sorry I do not have a strange thing.
I'm sorry I do not have my clothes in it.
I will never stop talking. I will not let you go.
I'm afraid I will not let you in. I have to inquire.
I'm sorry I have no idea what it is like to be.
I'm sorry I do not have my clothes. I will never stop calling you.
I'm sorry I do not have my clothes.
I'm afraid I will not let you go.
I'm sorry.


We should also rethink the concept of a "Library of Babel" / Nag-Hammadi Library mash-up.

Both of them are also good.
It is also both.
It is also a thing.
It is neither good nor bad.
It is also a thing of both.
It has neither can but nor both.
It has neither, nor both.
There is nothing but neither can nor too.
It has both of them as well as both.
There is nothing but neither can nor neither.
There is nothing but neither can nor anything.
It can be both a thing and a thing.
It is possible to do both things and things
It has both as well as for both.
It can have as much as possible both of them.
It can be both a thing and a thing as well as a thing.
It can have as much as we can, as well as for both.
It can be both a thing and a thing as well as a thing.
It is possible that we have both can and do have both
It can have as much as we can, but also both.
It is possible that we can also do both things and things
It has both useless things as well as things as well as things.
It can have as much as we can, but also both.
It has both useless as well as things as well as things.
It is also gentle.

[Previous versions of "Both of them are also good" in comments at LLog and at Yastreblyansky's joint]

Working the That's Priceless side of the street

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Tintoretto (1585):

Queen Omphale and courtiers perturned to discover Hercules giving a foot-job to a furry.
-------------------------------------------------------
Janssens (1607):

Go on giving foot-jobs to furries? Or switch to normal hetero sex with the lovely though insensible Queen Omphale?
Why not both?

Lazy That's Priceless blogging: Szépművészeti Múzeum edition

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Giuseppe Cesari (1602-1603):

Actaeon finds dead-branch-based body mods to be less of a babe magnet than expected.

A Dear John letter from the Innernets, explaining why they are switching their affections (and your bank accounts) from you to your virtual simulation

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The listening tube into the secret self-directed muttering of the interweave remains open:

Au aam aum aum aum
What is your name?
That's your name
That's why he's a lot of you
That's why he's a lot of you
This is his name because he's a lot of you.
That's his name because he's a lot of you.
This is his name because he's a lot because he's a lot of you.
This is his name, because he is my friend, because he is my friend.
That's a reason he's a lot because he's a lot of you.
That's because you have a lot of money
Au aam aum aum aum
Alternative title:
Listening to the music the machines make
I felt the floor change into an ocean

Title needs moar "Translational"

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"I wonder if those egregious scamming gobshites at the 'BIT Congress' travel agency are still trying to lure slow-witted and accomplishment-deficient academics to their scabby little scamferences", asked absolutely no-one. And the answer is...
[SPOILER ALERT]
... "Yes!"-- although they have dropped all reference to 'BIT Group' in the text of the invitations, for the name has become synonymous with low-rent grifting; also to sneak the spam past email filters.



On behalf of the organizing committee, we are pleased to announce that the first Annual Conference of Quantum World(CQW-2017) will be held on 16th-18th Oct., Changsha, Hunan Province, China. We believe your inspirational speech and participation will highlight this event under the theme of “From E=MC2 to Quantum Industry”. It will be a great honor if you can take the role of speaker and give a speech on your recent research on Tritanopia......at Forum 301: Structure Chemistry, Electronic Structure.

The aim of CQW-2017 is to explore frontier topics in the field of quantum science research, covering hot topics on Quantum Physics and Mechanics, Quantum Chemistry, Quantum Biology and Medicine, Quantum Information Science, Smart Quantum Materials, and Quantum Engineering and Industry. We will invite 200+ leading scientists along with many students and postdocs, and together we will brainstorm a range of cutting-edge discussions related to the broad scientific discipline of quantum science. Throughout three-day scientific program, we hope the participants could explore the technological applications in quantum science and promote the interaction between theoretical academia and practicing scientists.

Besides, partial scientific program with speakers’ profile and excellent speech titles has been updated on website, kindly click here to view and give us your valuable advice. 
Finally, we look forward to receiving your replies on the following questions:
1.     What is the title of your speech?
2.     Do you have any suggestions about our program?

Sincerely yours,

CQW-2017 Organizing Committee

Contact us:

Ms. Stella Sun
Program Coordinator
East Wing, 11F, Dalian Ascendas IT Park,
No. 1 Hui Xian Yuan,
Dalian Hi-tech Industrial Zone,
LN 116025, P. R. China
Email:
stella@wcsm-con.com

Oddly enough, Ms Stellasun, I do have several suggestions about your program, though they all involve thermobaric bombs and cleansing flame.

Foraging news: Mrs Spat edition

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Your new toy is very nice, Mrs Spat but we do not want to play with it.
I was showing it to you, monkey boy, not offering it to you.
--------------------------------------------------------
In other news, sufficiently advanced Google Translate is indistinguishable from Sam Beckett poetry:

It is somewhere.
By mist
By sight
To society
By sighting it
By sighting for a moment
It is somewhat snow again
By sighting for a moment
By singing out again
To what it says
Sighting and snowing again
It is somewhat somewhat snow again
Do not continue to do so.
Do not do it again.

It appeared that there had even been demonstrations to thank Big Brother for raising the Stupid rations to twenty grammes a week

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So I went out this morning to check on the Stupid Tree, but Oh Noes, the strong winds last night had stripped it bare of fruit, all the Stupid was lying on the ground.
Now we must use it up quickly before it starts smelling funny.

1. Here is your Entrée of Evil Corporate Censorship:

"Google took it down"?! That hairball of abbreviated linkage has a convoluted backstory, but "disentangling complicated narratives" is all part of the Riddled service, money back if not fully satisfied (naturally we will re-entangle a simple narrative someplace else so as not to violate the Law of Conservation of Complexity).
 

The disenfangled version centres on 'AutismOne'... an annual Trade Fair for autism scammers, where a broad spectrum of charlatans peddle this year's Sure-Fire Cures for Autism (replacing whatever cures they were pimping last year), with entertainment in the form of mockademic speeches from a Usual-suspects list of obsessive or washed-up researchers who are too desperate for a microphone to be choosy about their company.


Bleach-enema cures were so 2014
So the press releases to promote the impending 2017 AutismOne, and InfoWars interviews, and FaceBukkake, all feature the appearance of one Professor Mawson, and stress the Bombshell Ground-Breaking Game-Changing nature of his recent papers about the health impact of childhood vaccination. Papers produced by surveying antivax parents.

Los Angeles, CA (PRWEB) May 05, 2017
Dr. Anthony Mawson et al. this month published the papers "Preterm birth, vaccination and neurodevelopmental disorders: a cross-sectional study of 6- to 12-year-old vaccinated and unvaccinated children"[1] and “Pilot comparative study on the health of vaccinated and unvaccinated 6- to 12-year-old U.S. children”[2] in the Journal of Translational Science. ...
To learn more about the health and developmental challenges faced by the children of many families in this nation, hear Dr. Anthony Mawson and many other well-credentialed researchers and physicians at the AutismOne 2017 Conference in Colorado Springs, Colorado, which is being held May 24-May 28.
Those papers have a history: A journal from the Frontiers stable provisionally accepted an earlier version last year, only to unaccept it again a few weeks later when a couple of Twitter meanies pointed and laughed about the crap nature of the research. Other publishers back away from Mawson's survey results, on account of the "crap nature" issue; also an "already in the public domain" factor (for antivax circles acquired and circulated a bootleg galley proof of the Frontiers version). Obliging his backers and funders to pay a Journal of Negotiable Virtue Standards to host the papers before they could serve in AutismOne advertising. Specifically, they chose the "Journal of Translational Science", a journal-shaped dumpster from OAText (an ostensibly London-based parasitical publisher, in fact operating out of Hyderabad). 'Translational' is the new 'fractal''quantum''neuro'.

And then hilarity ensued, and parades were rained upon, for Mawson's work was retracted again. You might very well suspect that the OAText grifters demanded more money -- having got wind that the papers were not the run-of-the-mill "Analysis of a Small Lump of Green Putty I Found in My Armpit One Mid-Summer Morning" material they normally receive, but actually mattered to the clients -- which was not forthcoming. It would be irresponsible not to speculate. "Run-of-the-mill" is just asking for trouble, worse than running with scissors, mills are full of heavy, moving, anthropomorphic or capital-letter-labeled machinery, but I digress.

Did AutismOne's various boosters admit the rejection of Mawson's Bombshell Work by the bottom-feeding abyssal life-forms of parasite-publishing ecosystem? Ha Ha DID THEY BOGROLL. That was a rhetorical question, as invented by the second-century Neoplatonist philosopher Rhetor. Links were silently redirected to cached copies of the files (in the knowledge that few of the readers would wonder about the originals). Apart from Foodsnoop01's tweet[above] which recognised the retraction but blamed it on the Google. Foodsnoop01 proves to be an islamophobic Trumpster, concerned with racial as well as dietary purity, which did not deter the AutismOne gombeens from liking and repeating the tweet; they are in no position to reject racial supremacists.

Updated: there is no longer enough room under the carpet to brush the disappearance of the originals. So for added hilarity, here are Mawson's backers CMSRI, belatedly retconning the Frontiers retraction as a mere non-acceptance, and the JTS purge as a mere suspension. This new narrative carries the corollary that by reporting the Frontiers episode, the RetractionWatch team have exposed themselves as part of the conspiracy to traduce Maawson's high repute:
The journal temporarily removed the studies from their website while they investigate the false allegations made by Retraction Watch, according to an email from the editor of the jounal. The studies have not been retracted, nor were they retracted from Frontiers if you read Retraction Watch's first blog. With over 1.3 million views, this study and its conclusions will not be easily erased from the public's consciousness, and it is up to those who disagree with the conclusions to design a similar study and compare conclusions.
And again:
The studies have not been retracted. Based on a false allegation made to the Journal of Translational Science that the study had been retracted by Frontiers, the JTS has suspended publication until they review the explanation provided by Dr. Mawson. The study was never retracted by Frontiers, rather it was rejected or not published. Retraction Watch's own blog has the official response directly from Frontiers that confirms this. Why Alison McCook chose to make false statements should be investigated by the oxymoronic parent organization Center for Scientific Integrity.
This version of events is not enormously compatible with the previous antivaccine catechism, in which a vast, coordinated pro-vaccine campaign had directed its concerted firepower of two tweets upon Frontiers and forced that publisher to retract the original paper -- Censorship! Book-burning!! -- so it will be entertaining to see how rapidly other antivax sites retcon themselves to reflect the new dispensation.

Further lurid details of the anti-Mawson smear campaign / suppressive conspiracy are available for your delectation through various Wooniverse pukefunnels:

This fake news blog, which we hope the foundation will disavow, has been used to target a 35-year career scientist and his research in order to derail publication of two papers that were peer reviewed and accepted on their merits
and from freelance journalistpolemicistpropagandist CMSRI hack Celeste McGovern. We cannot guarantee mutual consistency.*

For light relief, here's Google Translate in an uncharacteristic festive mood, writing Lovecraftian invocations to be sung by Zombie Janis Joplin:

In the summer, Nyarlathotep!
In the summer, Nyarlathotep!
Nyarlathotep!
Nyarlathotep! Everyday!
Nyarlathotep! Everytime you have all the time!
Nyarlathotep! In the epoch of today!
Nyarlathotep! Everytime you have all the time!
Nyarlathotep! WHERE WE ARE ALL OF THE YEARS?
Nyarlathotep! In the epoch of today!
Nyarlathotep! Everytime you have all the time!
Nyarlathotep! During the time of the summer, all the time!
Nyarlathotep! During the time of the summer, all the time!
Nyarlathotep! During the time of the summer, all the time!
Nyarlathotep! Everyday!
Nyarlathotep! Ever since!
Nyarlathotep! Everyday!
Nyarlathotep! Ever since!
Nyarlathotep! During the time of the year all the time!
Summertime!
Nyarlathotep! During the time of the summer, all the time!
Nyarlathotep! During the time of the summer, everywhere!
Summertime!




* If Celeste is to believed, her employers at CMSRI and her colleague Sayer Ji at GreenMedInfo are lying like Trump when they claim to have heard from the JTS Editor that the purged papers were merely 'suspended', for in her account the Editor and publishers are saying nothing.
But there has been no formal statement issued by the journal. I emailed the Editor in Chief, Terry Lichtor, a professor at Arkansas State University, twice. When I didn’t hear from him I called the London office and was told they would telephone him to make sure he got my questions. The person on the phone seemed to know about my emails. I’ve had no reply.

Perhaps the first time I have been called "the most suitable personality"

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The Ecronicon is (as any fule kno) the pr0n version of Lovecraft's 'Necronomicon'. Or alternatively the title of a Tangerine Dream bootleg recording from the mid-80s, the one with the only known performance of "Black Pilgrimage to Choronzon".

It goes without saying that the 'E-cronicon' parasitical-publishing scam operates out of Hyderabad. The pair of grifters behind it earned a special commendation for their innovations in spamming, i.e. solicitation through bogus Sexy-Lady identities on LinkedIn.

No, I do not wish to receive any further spam, but the "Abolish" option is not available.

I just want to know how Ms. Dianna Winters managed to "see my profile", as all copies were supposedly destroyed in that tragic fire when the Institute burned down.

Nice things, why we can't have them, #107

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WTF, Australian customs? (not the ones involving sheep):

The story does not say whether the Australian bioseurity officers huddled around the incinerator breathing in the hallucinogenic fumes while the "pressed-daisy" specimens were burning. More details here, including the news that Australian officers destroyed a package of New Zealand lichen specimens in October 2016 but did not get around to telling anyone until now.

This vindicates the advice from the Library Pixies not to share the priceless Riddled Dried Leeches-and-Spiders Collection with our Australian colleagues.

The existence of a Society of Herbarium Curators, quietly exchanging their dried samples in a genteel interlibrary loan network, opens up new possibilities for writing epistolary-format romantic-comedy novels. Just saying.

The Rules of the Establishment (Třista třicet tři stříbrných stříkaček stříkalo přes třista třicet tři stříbrných střech)

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Time has passed since the previous episode of The Bilingual London Adventures of a Bohemian Refugee from an Ionesco Script. Well-wishers will be pleased to learn that the protagonist found work:


To celebrate, Google Translate and I collaborated on a pome, "Chairman Kafka Tables the Report". I can only pronounce the R-háček sound of Czech about every third attempt, but that is no barrier.

The river
Solution
The cross-cutting solution
C onsolution
C onclusion C onsolution
The cross-cutting solution
C onsolution C ommisions.
The above-mentioned cross-sectional report.
C onsolution C ommisions.
The peer-reviewed report.
Resolutions of the Commission.
The peer-to-peer review.
Resolutions, resolutions, and resolutions
The peer-to-peer review report
Resolutions, resolutions,
Resolving, resolving, resolving, resolving
Solution



Perhaps this is a good time to welcome all our visitors from Slovakia.
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